God, I must sound like a fool. God, I love him so much.

I guess everyone knows that magic moment when the fall-in-love hormones start acting. Sooner or later, everyone experiences that esoteric whirlwind being able to make adults from teenagers and teenagers from adults. This world would definitely be much poorer without that weird and awesome condition of mind called LOVE. So let's just remind it.
Brittany from the USA, a 19-year-old girl, found out a couple weeks ago she fell in love. And not having a chance to tell this news to anybody in person she just cried it out into the internet world. She seems to be pretty down-to-earth and she doesn't blog too often, but this time the urge to share her feelings about her first love must have been really strong because she „opened her heart“ twice within a short time. Such a lovely poetry. So enjoy this sincere and genuine profession of love. I think it's worth reading as well as other parts of her blog. It's a window into the heart of a girl who changed the school bus for commuting.

Happenings
Jul 11, 2006 at 12:27 AM
It's been a long time since I've written about my life. Usually all I do is sit down and think of something that's been bugging me as of late. But today I can't think of anything. I've discovered something; I think it's called love but I've had no recent experience with it that I find myself doubting everything I do and not knowing what to say when confronted with the all too daunting, "I love you." And you know what I say back? "I love you too." And that's because I do. Brittany, the girl who never had a boyfriend, who thought she would eventually end up in the convent, the girl who was happy with being single, has finally found someone that actually likes her. Wow, what a difference having someone in your life makes. Now all I want to do is talk to him...all the time. The girl that hates the phone wants to talk to someone, and for hours on end. Now I understand why my sisters are always on the phone talking to their boyfriends. And now they have a reason to yell at me because I gave them so much shit about everything. I feel bad now. But not too bad.
I wonder what is to come. Will it be good? Will it be bad? If anything, I don't want to end up pregnant at 21 and being divorced by the time I am 25. That's just not something I look very highly on. I love this guy, a lot, and I can only hope he truely feels the same about me.
God, I must sound like a fool.

Love
Jul 11, 2006 at 11:44 PM
It's not everyday I want to talk to someone at all times. It's not everyday I'm on my phone every minute I can spare. And yet, that's how it's been as of late. He calls me, and I want to talk to him. He calls me, and I actually answer the phone. He calls me, and I don't want to hang up. He has some problems with self esteem, and all I can say about that is that everyone does. I have insecurities, many of them. One of them being my inability to say what they are. There are a lot of things I feel insecure about. My body, my image, my ability to say something before I think about it. The way I piss people off with what I say, the way I get pissed off by the stupidest things. My inability to accept the fact that he likes the way I sing and why I feel the need to tell him I suck at it every time I start. I love him. I know I do. I've never felt this way about anyone ever before. Never. I don't understand how I can know him for so short a time and already know I love him. And he's 9 years older than me. Not something I want to be telling my parents They'd surely put in their two cents about the subject. I just can't believe I love him. No, I can believe that. What I can't believe is that he loves me. God, I love him so much.